12 April

I can't sleep , was texting wit MR YL , and he asked me to accept him , I did not answer and i just changed the topic . He's like waiting for me to accept him wit much hope. should i go fr it or what ? Seriously not in the mood today , Everyone change so in a sudden , i can't catch up , i wonder is everyone like this ? they change all the time . They find you when they need you , I've tried so hard to mix myself in , but / i fail , same to the GUY that i LOVED , I always wish to be loved by someone , but it seems like , I'm just putting to much hope. and i get disappointed  all the time , everytime i put hope in it , all i get is just tears , I wish to give up all the time , but i failed . i really failed . Should i just give up or just leave it like this ?  I can't tell anyone how i felt right now , i act nothing in school but when i came back from school , i begin to be EMO . Sleep every afternoon just to stop myself from thinkin , stay back just to stay myself away from the phone. Sometimes i felt so stupid waiting for a guy that might doesn.t likes ma , or he likes me but he doesn.t wan to tell me . I always tell myself that in this world there is much more guy for me to choose but i seems to just fuck myself to him . Seriously what the fuck weyy .   anyway , enough for today . i'll continue tomorrow . Good night world .